ROCKVILLE, MD — Montgomery County officials announced Friday, the creation of the Montgomery County Coffee Bean Control Board, a new government agency that will oversee the distribution, sale, taxation, and general enjoyment of coffee throughout the county.
Officials say the idea was inspired by the county’s successful monopolistic model of controlling alcohol distribution and concluded there was no compelling reason to stop there.
“If Montgomery County can control your bourbon, your scotch, your tequila, why shouldn’t we control your cup of coffee, your latte, or your Americano?” one county official explained. “Frankly, allowing residents to purchase coffee directly from private businesses has gone unchecked for far too long.”
Coffee Bean Control Board Explained
Under the proposed system, local coffee shops would be required to purchase approved coffee beans through the county, which would acquire them at wholesale prices, apply a modest government markup, add several taxes and fees, and then graciously allow businesses to sell the coffee back to residents.
County officials stressed that the program is not primarily about generating revenue.
“It’s about public health, fairness, sustainability, equity, responsible caffeine consumption, and approximately $37 million in new annual revenue,” said one official.The county is also reportedly considering a Coffee Excise Tax, Bean Distribution Fee, Caffeine Impact Surcharge, and a 25-cent Single-Use Coffee Cup Climate Resilience Assessment.
Residents wishing to purchase more than two pounds of coffee beans at once may eventually be required to obtain a county-issued High Capacity Caffeine Permit.
More Government Control To Come?
Following the announcement, county leaders confirmed they are already studying additional products that could benefit from similar government oversight. Among the possibilities reportedly under consideration are county-controlled sales of gasoline, steaks, toilet paper, and eventually air.
“We’re really just asking one question,” an official said. “What are Montgomery County residents currently purchasing that we’re not getting a piece of?”
The Coffee Bean Control Board is expected to begin operations as soon as the county finishes hiring its first 73 employees.
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